Meanwhile, one after another enter and try to come up with a plan to save the world. Each character is based on a famous super hero and everything is played for laughs. You have Superduperman, Ratman, and Beetleman, to name a few.
Cast of 12. (6 males, 6 females) Gender may vary. About 10-12 mins.
CAST OF CHARACTERS:
RECEPTIONIST: Speaks 616 words. Main character who has to get the team together in an emergency.
SUPERDUPERMAN: Speaks 255 words. Based on Superman only sillier. Brings along his PR person.
BEETLEMAN: 202 words. Like Spiderman, he looks like a bug (beetle) but has a Beatles wig on and whenever he talks, he always says the name of a Beatles tune.
LOIS STREET: 138 words. Superduperman’s PR girl, based on Lois Lane. She’s all business.
CAPTAIN JACK PIDGEON: 128 words. Based on Jack Sparrow, the pirate captain.
RATMAN: 118 words. Based on Batman, only more like a rat.
JESUS: 105 words. Traditional Biblical Jesus character.
THE INDESCRIBABLE BULK: 66 words. Based on The Incredible Hulk, only this guy is really fat.
SUDS: 66 words. Based on a Power Puff Girl, only this is a Shower Stuff Girl.
MONA LISA: 57 words. A female teenage mutant ninja toad.
WHITE FLOWER ARRANGER: 55 words. Based on Power Rangers. But their main skill is arranging flowers.
PINK FLOWER ARRANGER: 48 words. Based on Power Rangers.
As the lights come up we see a female behind a desk, or a small table with a phone. The stage can be pretty clear otherwise, or it can just look like a normal reception area. She answers the phone.
(Answering the phone)
United Protection Agency of DC! We protect the world…how may I direct your call? (Pause) I’m sorry, everyone is at lunch right now, would you like to leave a voice mail for anyone in particular? (Pause) I beg your pardon? Just a minute while I get a pen… okay…go ahead…
(She starts writing down something)
Okay…we have ten minutes. Okay… there is a…a what? Did you say a mom? There is a mom on the premises? (Pause) Oh! A Bomb! There is a bomb on the premises! That’s bomb… B-O-M-B…right? Like ka-pow! Okay.. I got ya. And it goes off in 10 minutes…. got it. And how big is this bomb? They might want to know that. (Pause)
It will destroy the world…got it. Is there anything else? (Pause) Well thank you for calling the United Protection Agency. I will relay your message as soon as they get back from their lunch. Should be about 15-20 minutes…(Pause) I understand, yes…10 minutes until the end of the world. Yes, I’ll let them know. Have a nice day!
She hangs up the phone and looks at the message. As she reads it over and makes a few corrections…She picks up the phone and pushes some buttons and then calmly declares:
CODE RED! CODE RED! ALL SUPER HEROES REPORT TO THE LOBBY IMMEDIATELY!
She looks at her watch and starts to look a little worried.
What are we going to do? Dear God…can you get us out of this mess? Please?
Jesus enters quietly and remains in the background and no one notices him. Superduperman runs in carrying Lois Street in his arms.
I got here as fast as I could. I had to carry Lois since she can’t fly.
He puts Lois down.
Hi, I’m Lois Street. I’m Superduperman’s P.R. girl.
I know, but why does he need his PR person with him when he’s on a mission?
Oh…Superduperman can’t just go and do anything that anyone wants anymore. There are agents and managers and all sorts of documents and agreements to sign as well as making sure that his image is not tarnished. I handle all of that.
Thank you, Miss Street.
(Looks at him all dreamy)
You can call me, Lois.
(to the receptionist)
What seems to be the problem, Miss?
There is a bomb on the premises and it will go off in less than 10 minutes.
Oh, that’s easy! We just need to evacuate the building. Unless you know where the bomb is and in that case, I can just throw it out to space before it explodes.
I hate that ending. It’s too simple, unrealistic, anticlimactic and insulting. And I don’t know where the bomb is, and they said it will destroy the whole world.
Oh. Well, that’s a bit more difficult. Let me use my x-ray vision and see if I can find the bomb hidden some place.
He wanders around the stage trying to stare through walls. Lois pulls out a document from her bag.
I’m going to need you to sign this release form.
Ratman runs in.
I came as fast as I could.
Ratman! Good thing you are here!
You are always first to these things Superduperman! My rat mobile just can’t compete with your super duper speed.
Plus, you’re limited by the fact that you have to travel through the sewers.
Is that what I was smelling?
Okay…okay…enough with the rat jokes. I hear that all the time. People just don’t think rats are good for anything but eating garbage. Well, I guess that and cooking gourmet food, now.
Beetleman walks in.
Good day, Sunshine. What goes on? I would have been here sooner, but I took the long and winding road.
Beetleman! Good. I’m glad you’re here.
You know me…available eight days a week.
You can help Superduperman and Ratman find the hidden bomb.
Hidden bomb! Get back!
And it could destroy the entire world in less than ten minutes!
I can handle it with a little help from my friends.
He speaks into his wrist
Help! I need somebody! At the UPA immediately!
(To the others)
They’re weighted down with Krystal burgers, but it won’t be long until they get here. I can get Maxwell’s silver hammer…
Beetleman…it’s good that you’re here. Why don’t you crawl around on the outside of the building and see if you can find it?
Right. But we can’t just go helter skelter here, we need a plan.
I could have a plan drawn up and we could all sign it.
Don’t I know you? Penny Lane, right?
Lois. We don’t have time for that right now. We have to save the world.