When Snowflakes Collide

A small cast dealing with a dramatic and sensitive topic of marriage harmony.

Cast of 6 (3 males, 3 females)  All adult characters.  About 20-25 mins.

Written by Warren Sager

CAST OF CHARACTERS:

DIANE: (Speaks 1298 words) Unhappy wife in a struggling marriage.

KAREN: (Speaks 947 words) Diane’s friend who is full of advice.

STAN: (Speaks 901 words) Husband in a struggling marriage who just lost his job

WAYNE: (Speaks 552 words) Stan’s best friend.

BARBRA: (Speaks 480 words) Wayne’s wife.

PASTOR BOB: (Speaks 347 words) A kind and wise spiritual leader

Excerpt

Stan enters in a very bad mood, throws his coat on a chair and stops to flip through the mail.

DIANE So, you finally decided to come home…

STAN Don’t start that stuff!

DIANE I don’t understand how, after all these years, you can’t remember to call me when you have to work late! It’s common courtesy! It’s like you don’t care about me. I could be making dinner plans; and it would just be nice to know what time to expect you.

STAN Were you making dinner plans?

DIANE I said I COULD be.

STAN So… there’s no dinner in the fridge or something burnt on the stove.

DIANE The point is: you are not communicating with me when you work late! What am I supposed to think? That you are dead beside the road? I sit and wonder how long before I should start calling the hospitals or the police! I could be thinking all sorts of things… and… turns out you are just working late.

STAN I was NOT working late.

DIANE Oh. That’s a switch.

STAN What does that mean?

DIANE It means that you usually tell me that you were working late.

STAN That’s because I WAS working late… all those other times. Just not today.

DIANE Okay. And for some reason you decided not to let me know what was going to make you late today, either?

STAN I’m sorry.

DIANE (Sarcastic) Oh! Well! If you’re sorry, then!

STAN At least I’m consistent.

DIANE What?

STAN True to form. Since you say I never call you. Which isn’t true by the way, I have called you many times.

DIANE Whatever. I don’t even care anymore.

STAN Look I was not in the mood to talk to anyone … and I was not ready to come home. I lost my job today.

DIANE What??

STAN I was fired! Or laid off… or whatever you want to call it! I no longer have a job!

DIANE When did this happen?

STAN At a quarter to five! They made sure they got a full day’s work out of me first.

DIANE Why?? What reason?

STAN The usual. Downsizing.

DIANE But you have been there for years! You have seniority!

STAN That doesn’t matter anymore. It’s all about money. They figured out that they didn’t need my position, and also how much money they would save by not having me on the payroll.

DIANE Doesn’t seem fair.

STAN The world ain’t fair.

DIANE Stan! It’s seven o’clock! Where have you been for two hours?

STAN I needed some time to think.

DIANE Did you go to bar or something?

STAN When have I ever gone to a bar?

DIANE When have you ever been fired from a job? How am I supposed to know what you are doing?

STAN If you must know… I was talking to Wayne.

DIANE Wayne?! You lose your job and you go to Wayne’s?

STAN He is my best friend and I needed to talk.

DIANE Clearly, I’m not your best friend.

STAN No, and I’m not yours either. And I think if we are both honest… we are okay with that. It has never been any other way.

DIANE That is a sad reality. You know, most husbands would come home and tell their wives first.

STAN I’m not most husbands.

DIANE That’s for sure. Wait. You said that you were in no mood to talk to anyone! But now you are saying that you needed to talk to Wayne?

STAN Okay, so I miss spoke.

DIANE Yeah… what you meant to say was that you were not in the mood to talk to me, specifically.

STAN If you say so. I didn’t want you to know I went right over to Wayne’s. That’s why I wasn’t saying. But I DID know that if I came right home and told you… it was not going to be pleasant. I was right.

DIANE You don’t think I can be sympathetic about you losing your job?

STAN Frankly, no. So, I went to see someone who I knew would be. And I didn’t want you to know that either.

DIANE I don’t know why. He is obviously more important to you than I am. I’ve known that for years.

STAN Then you shouldn’t be surprised or upset. But since you have never liked Wayne…

DIANE I just think you could have done a lot better in the friend department.

STAN Wayne has always been there for me! And he was again today! And I will always be there for him!

DIANE How sweet. Sometimes I think you picked him just to spite me, because you know I don’t like him.

STAN I knew him before I knew you! If you could just make friends with Barbra, then we could be a nice foursome. But you won’t even try.

DIANE You know as well as I do that the two of them tried to talk you out of marrying me. How am I supposed to be buddy buddy with a woman who never gave me a chance?

STAN You’re the one who never gave her a chance. She accepted you once we were married.

DIANE Not true.

STAN You are so stubborn. Doesn’t matter what I say.

DIANE So, what happens now? Finding a job nowadays is hard!

STAN We start praying. Hard. Call the church and put it on the prayer chain.

DIANE I don’t think we should do that.

STAN Why not? I need all the prayers I can get!

DIANE That’s embarrassing! Why do we need to tell everyone our personal business?