Darren’s mother is on the verge of tears at every moment, and Lizzie’s dad is afraid he will forget his big line. Darren wants to talk to Lizzie on the phone but Lizzie doesn’t want to talk to him till after the wedding. Nerves are on edge and humor is all around as these two families prepare for this big change in their lives.
house.. and the other side of the stage is kept dark for the other
house.)
getting married!
MRS. MILLER: Don’t start, Harold!
MR. MILLER: Don’t start what? What are you talking about? I
haven’t started anything.
MRS. MILLER: You know that I am on pins and needles today. And any little thing will set me off and I don’t want to be crying all day long!
MR. MILLER: I don’t understand you. This is a day to celebrate
and be joyful!
MRS. MILLER: Okay… you can be joyful, but I am saying goodbye to our little boy! He is going out that door and when he comes back, it will only be to visit us with his new wife! That is a lot for a mother to swallow, and I am very emotional right now.
MR. MILLER: (puts his arm around her and hugs her) You are going to do just fine! Just think what a wonderful new daughter we are getting. We have nothing to be sad about. Lizzie is the sweetest girl in the world.
MRS. MILLER: Oh… what her poor mother must be going through right now!
MR. MILLER: Why don’t you call her and see how she is doing? She might need some encouragement… and it might do you some good, too.
MRS. MILLER: Oh Harold, honestly! That last thing that poor woman needs this morning is to have somebody calling her on the phone! She is the mother of the bride! Her situation is worse than mine! I don’t know what it is like to lose a daughter!
MR. MILLER: She isn’t losing a daughter, she is gaining a son.
MRS. MILLER: Oh, if I hear that cliché line one more time, I think I will spit!
MR. MILLER: Alright, I will put it differently. We are just two
families who are going to be sharing their kids from now on.
MRS. MILLER: Oh! I don’t know how you can be so calm and so
rational. (calling offstage) Darren! Your breakfast! You don’t
want cold breakfast today, do you?
MR. MILLER: Have you even started it yet? I don’t see anything.
MRS. MILLER: It’s all in the oven. It will be done soon. But if
I don’t tell him that it’s cold, he won’t hurry.
MR. MILLER: What are we having?
MRS. MILLER: Biscuits and gravy.
MR. MILLER: Biscuits and gravy??
MRS. MILLER: It’s Darren’s favorite.
MR. MILLER: Since when?
MRS. MILLER: Oh, I don’t know. Since he had it at her house once! You know how these boys are. Well, you should know, you were one once.
MR. MILLER: Where’s the paper?
MRS. MILLER: On the chair. (he picks up and looks at the paper and she continues to stir the gravy) (lights come up on the other
side of the stage revealing another kitchen just as the phone rings.)
MRS. DEUKOWSKI: (entering quickly to answer the phone) Hello? Oh, good morning, Darren! …. Lizzie? Oh, I don’t know, let me check. Lizzie! It’s Darren on the phone!
LIZZIE: (offstage) I don’t want to talk to him!
MRS. DEUKOWSKI: Darren…
LIZZIE: (running in) But don’t tell him that!
MRS. DEUKOWSKI: Just a minute, Darren. (puts her hand over the phone) What do you want me to tell him?
LIZZIE: Tell him that it is bad luck to see the bride on the day
of the wedding, well, before I come down the aisle I mean.
MRS. DEUKOWSKI: You want me to tell him that?
LIZZIE: No, because he will say that I should not believe in luck
and superstitions.
MRS. DEUKOWSKI: And he would be right. So, what do you want me to tell him?
LIZZIE: Tell him… Oh, Mom. You know… it is just tradition that
the groom not see the bride before the wedding!
MRS. DEUKOWSKI: Okay… and when did we get a picture phone?
LIZZIE: What?
MRS. DEUKOWSKI: He can’t see you, Elizabeth!
LIZZIE: I don’t want to TALK to him either! It’s the same
principle!
MRS. DEUKOWSKI: So what do you want me to tell him?
LIZZIE: I don’t know, can’t you think of something?
MRS. DEUKOWSKI: Well, I’m not going to make something up.
I will just tell him the truth.
LIZZIE: And what is that?
MRS. DEUKOWSKI: That you don’t want to talk to him.
LIZZIE: No! You can’t tell him that! Tell him… tell him…
Oh, let me talk to him! (she comes over and takes the phone…
looks at it, and then hands it back to her mother and runs
out of the room)
MRS. DEUKOWSKI: Darren? I don’t think you are going to be
able to talk to her till after the wedding. Do you have a
message that I can give her? …. Okay…. And she loves you, too.
See you at the church. Good bye.
LIZZIE: (running back in) What did you tell him?
MRS. DEUKOWSKI: Don’t worry. I think he will still marry you.
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