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Leaving A Legacy

$5.00

In this sketch (good for VALENTINE’S DAY or anytime) Herb and Mollie are sitting in their rocking chairs talking about their kids and grandkids.

They are feeling like they have failied with one of their sons who is not going to church anymore, and so Mollie has a plan to get some of the grandkids together to try to have a positive influence on one in particular. Herb is thinking about whether they have left a good legacy to their children. They bicker a bit and forget things… but they are a cute old couple. This is also a scene from the larger production called, “The Love Festival.”2 actors (one male, one female,) About 9 minutes.

Excerpt:

(An elderly couple enter with canes and approach two rocking chairs)MOLLIE: Herb? Herb, are you coming?

HERB: I’m comin’ Mollie, hold your shoes on…hold your shoes on.

MOLLIE: You’re the slowest thing…

HERB: Help me into my chair, Mama. (she helps him)

MOLLIE: Get mine going, would you? (he starts the chair to rocking
and she gyrates with the chair and finally sits) weeeeee! Oh.. my
hearts just a racin’.

HERB: Boy, Mama, you keep me young! You got my blood a pumpin’
again!

MOLLIE: Oh, you silly old man! And stop callin’ me Mama, the
children have all been gone for years, and you still insist on
callin’ me Mama.

HERB: Why, I thought you liked being called Mama?

MOLLIE: Herb, I’ve told you time and again that I thought it was
cute while the kids were all small, but I would prefer you to call
me Mollie from now on… or one of those other pet names you have
for me.

HERB: This is the first I’ve heard of it.

MOLLIE: Herbert Philip Mackenzie What am I going to do with you?

HERB: (after a pause) What are ya -thinkin?

MOLLIE: I was thinkin’ about how you never listen to anything that
I tell you, and then I have to tell you all over again as if it
were the first time.

HERB: Wanna know what I was thinkin about? (Having not heard a word
of what she said) I was sittin’ here thinkin’ about Philip.

MOLLIE: Philip?

HERB: Uh-huh, did you see him the other night? When he was a
sittin’ up there on the couch as cute as he could be just a
listenin’ to what was being said as if he understood every word.

MOLLIE: Philip? As cute as he could be?! Our Philip?

HERB: Did I say Philip? Oh for Pete’s sake, I didn’t mean Philip,
what in the samhill made me say that? Phil’s boy, you know, what’s
his name?

MOLLIE: You’re talkin’ about Trent.

HERB: Trent, that’s it. I can never remember a name like that. What
kind of a name is that to give a boy, anyway?

MOLLIE: Well, I certainly wouldn’t name a girl, Trent.

HERB: I wouldn’t name any poor child, Trent.

MOLLIE: And you didn’t, you made us stick to regular names like
Philip, and James and Joseph.

HERB: Good names, all of them.

MOLLIE: Well, you picked ‘em.

HERB: What do you mean, I picked them? We did it together.

MOLLIE: Herb, you didn’t like any name that I picked out, so we
ended up going with your ideas completely.

HERB: I don’t remember that at all.

MOLLIE: That’s because you only remember what you want to remember.

HERB: Well, I certainly remember that it was you who wanted the
name Caroline because you had a relative with that name, and she
was your favorite aunt or something.

MOLLIE: Land sakes, Herb, have you gone off your rocker? I guess
I’ll have to send you to the Funny Farm. You’re the one who had the
Aunt Caroline, not me. My favorite aunt was Agnes!

HERB: Boy, I’m sure glad we didn’t use that one! Can you imagine a
daughter named Agnes?

MOLLIE: You silly old man, you would have loved all your kids just
as much no matter what names they had. And you love all the grand
kids, too. I do think you probably favor some over the others, but
I suppose that is normal and can’t be helped.

HERB: Well, I sure do like Scotty; he has always been special to
me.
MOLLIE: Doesn’t he go by Scott, now?

HERB: Oh, he still let’s me call him, Scotty… but I suspect I’m
the only one.

MOLLIE: What were you and he talking about the other night?

HERB: Oh, he was telling me all about his CD’s. He asked me if I
wanted to listen to one of them. I told him that I was very fond of
him, and I wanted to keep it that way. So, I declined his offer.
Then he told me that it was Christian music, and that I might like
it. So, I had him just read me the words. This one song was all
about a man who wanted to leave a legacy to his kids…

MOLLIE: A legacy? You mean like a big family? Cuz we sure got that.
I mean what do you call 6 children and 13 grandchildren?

HERB: An army. No, that’s not what I was talking about. A legacy is
what you leave with them, and I don’t mean money. It’s what we
believe in, and all the things that we are and stand for. You know,
that was passed down to the children. So I was wondering if I have
left a good legacy to the kids and to their kids.

MOLLIE: You got all this from a CD?

HERB: And I didn’t even listen to it. I decided that I really liked
it, and told Scotty that I had better quit while I was still on his
side. The poetry was so nice, and I figured it would be that rock
stuff and I would end up hating it.

MOLLIE: Poor Scotty, he must think that his grandparents are a
couple of real fuddy-duddies.

HERB: Naw, he told me that I was a lot more “with it” than his
“weird” parents.

MOLLIE: You mean there is hope for us after all?

HERB: I guess so. But you know, I wonder sometimes just how much
hope there is in this world for those poor kids. Have we done our
best in raisin up our children?

MOLLIE: Well, if we haven’t, it’s a little late to do anything about
that now, unless, somehow, we can get through to the grandchildren.

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