But It’s My Money!



A married couple are having a discussion about giving money to the church. The first part takes place at home as they are getting ready to go to the church for a pledge dinner. The second part takes place at the dinner at their table as they discuss how much to pledge.


A lot of the arguments as to why one might not want to give to the church are brought up in the sketch and also the scriptural reasons as to why you should. Humorous and serious all at the same time.

Two actors. (male and female) Only about 12-13 minutes.


HUSBAND: (entering the room) So tell me again what this is that we
have to go to at church tonight.

WIFE: It’s the pledge dinner! (or insert name of event)

HUSBAND: And why do we have to be there?

WIFE: Because we have been members of the church for a long time
and it won’t look right if we don’t go.

HUSBAND: But they’re going to be asking for money, right?

WIFE: They will be asking us to make a pledge. You won’t have to
write a check!

HUSBAND: I always hate that when people ask me for money. Why do
we have to go to this thing?

WIFE: Isn’t the church important to you? I think it is time we
began to consider how we can help more.

HUSBAND: We do a lot. Now they want our money, too.

WIFE: We should be giving anyway. We really should be tithing. I
feel so bad that we aren’t doing that.

HUSBAND: Now don’t start up on that tithing thing again! You know
how I feel about that.

WIFE: I know. But we are told in scripture to give a tenth to God.

HUSBAND: That is in the Old Testament and we are under a new

WIFE: Well, the way I understand the New Testament is that Jesus
came to fulfill the law not abolish it. Besides, I think it is the
principle of the thing. If we give a tenth back to God, then we are
blessed for doing it. You know that scripture that says “give and
it will be given to you; good measure, pressed down, shaken together,
running over, it will pour into your lap”?

HUSBAND: Old Testament.

WIFE: Luke is in the Old Testament?

HUSBAND: Well, that other verse on tithing is in the Old Testament.

WIFE: Well, I still read the Old Testament…and I think that verse in
Malachi about tithing is for today!

HUSBAND: Well, we can’t afford to give a tenth!

WIFE: I say we can’t afford not to. If you ask me, the reason we
never have enough money for anything is because we are not giving…
the devourer is devouring it. God honors and blesses those who give
regularly, and keeps the devil from taking all their money. You
know, if you read that passage, you will see what it is that God is
talking about. And if you understand that, you will see that we
can’t afford not to give.

HUSBAND: We give regularly. I always throw a couple bucks in the

WIFE: Oh that really goes a long way! What is that… less than one

HUSBAND: Hey… we’ve got bills to pay!

WIFE: And the church doesn’t have bills to pay? How do you think
they pay for their utilities? Lights and gas and electricity for
that building has to be a lot of money every month. Do you use the
lights? Do you use the toilet paper in the men’s room? Do you
flush the toilet and wash your hands afterward?

HUSBAND: Very funny. Now you’re being silly.

WIFE: I’m not being silly! These are things that you need to think
about. What about the missionaries that the church supports? If
everybody was tithing, I bet they would be getting more support.
And how do you think the pastor and all the staff get paid? The
church is not a business that earns money from selling a product.
It all comes from that basket being passed every week and the people
putting their tithes and offerings into it.

HUSBAND: So is that what this dinner is about tonight, to get people
like me to start tithing?

WIFE: Well, that would certainly be more money than they were getting
from you before!

HUSBAND: So, what about the people who are already tithing? Why do
thy need a pledge dinner?

WIFE: Because we are talking about tithes AND offerings. I think
the pledge is something that the church wants you to make that will
be over and above your tithe giving.

HUSBAND: You see! They want even more of my money! I just don’t have
it to give.

WIFE: You just don’t have any faith that’s all!

HUSBAND: I don’t think faith has anything to do with it.

WIFE: It has everything to do with it! You are afraid to give God
the first of your paycheck, because there won’t be enough left to pay
the bills and feed your stomach and entertain yourself. But if you
stepped out on faith and gave to God and then trusted Him to supply
all your needs… I think we might find out that we have plenty!

HUSBAND: Well that just doesn’t make common sense.

WIFE: Don’t try to figure it out! God’s ways are not our ways. You
are thinking with your human understanding and reasoning. We are
talking about something spiritual here. I think we are missing out
on a big blessing because we are not tithing.

HUSBAND: So, you want us to start giving a tenth of my income, plus
give an extra gift as well, by making a pledge for the coming year?

WIFE: I want you to consider it dear. That’s all I’m asking…that
you would consider it.

HUSBAND: Well, we are discussing it, so I guess I am considering it.

WIFE: You are?

HUSBAND: Yes… and I have considered it now, and I’ve heard all your
arguments, and I still think we don’t have that kind of money. Just
add it up dear. Ten percent of all I make is a lot of money!

2 reviews for But It’s My Money!

  1. Warren, this script is most excellent!!!! My congrats to you for coming up with something that is not only funny but on point and in the spirit. I am very happy with it. Once again, this was exactly the type of thing I was looking for.

    Matthew O’Donohue, Bakersfield, CA http://www.wecollect.com

  2. Thank you so much for sending me this script. I started reading and couldn’t put it down until I had finished the whole script. I can hardly wait until I pick a couple from our church to do the performance, this is great material. Again, thank you for this wonderful script, I love it and there is so much truth in the script as far as some church people goes. May God Bless and Keep You.

    Audrey Maltie-Brown, Greater Friendship Missionary Baptist Church, Houston, TX

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